All Moms Need Support
Whether you are a first time mom, or welcoming additional children to your family, a new moms support group can be a lifeline, providing a validating, warm, and supportive space to share your experience and learn from others in this same stage of life. When we share our joys and challenges with others, we foster a sense of genuine connection that benefits not only us but our new babies as well. 4am feedings may feel a lot less lonely and difficult when we have a friend to text. At Wildflower, we offer this resource to new moms because we understand the upheaval that this life transition can bring and how important support from other moms is during this life stage.
Postpartum is Such a Fragile Time
The first year of a child’s life is a particularly vulnerable time for new moms as they navigate the numerous social, hormonal, physical, and emotional changes (Wildflower, 2022). After delivery, our bodies undergo massive hormonal shifts that can impact our mood (Sebastian, 2016). Typically, when we undergo a major physical event we are afforded the space, time, and support to rest and recover. For new moms, this is usually not the case with the expectation to immediately begin caring for her newborn (Sebastian, 2016).
The fatigue resulting from labor combined with the sleepless nights of caring for a newborn, can create conditions for exhaustion beyond what we most of us have ever previously experienced. Whether we are waking to feed, startling at the slightest noise the baby makes, or getting up to check if the baby is ok, all of these wakings lead to very disrupted sleep. This can result in exhaustion that makes even the most simple, daily tasks feel like a Herculean effort. Without adequate support, this can mean we don’t have the energy to nourish ourselves, connect with others socially, and engage in other activities that fill our cups.
Social Isolation
Social isolation, or having limited social contact, can be one of the greatest challenges that new moms face in the postpartum period. Feelings of loneliness, whether that be lack of close attachments with others or the absence of a larger social network, can be particularly difficult during the early stages of motherhood (Taylor et al., 2021). Some of the realities of caring for a new baby create conditions that can be isolating such as spending most of the day at home, alone, and without former social and professional connections (Taylor et al., 2021). The days can start to blend together as we navigate long, sleepless nights and little routine.
The Pressure to Act Like We “Have it all Together”
We can all picture in our minds the blissful image of how new motherhood is portrayed in our culture. Sweet snuggled babies, little toes, and smiling mothers are just a few of the images we can conjure that supposedly reflect the realities of this time. However, we know that this is not the experience for everyone. There seems to be little room in our society to acknowledge the loss that some of us may feel when we become mothers (Taylor et al., 2021). We say goodbye for a time to our former selves that could spontaneously grab dinner with a friend, head to bed early after an exhausting day, and enjoy free time and flexibility in our schedules. Our bodies change, our relationships change, and our careers change, along with so many other deeply-held identities.
The pressure to feel and behave a certain way as new mothers can lead to feelings of incompetence, guilt, and distress (Taylor et al., 2021). When new mothers cannot achieve this ideal we have set forth, it is also common to feel inadequate and different from others (Taylor et al., 2021). As the reality of new motherhood sets in and does not match what we pictured in our minds, we may feel hopeless and have difficulty coping with the many responsibilities we are tasked with (Taylor et al., 2021). In some cases, this perceived sense of failure may even prevent us from reaching out and connecting with others (Taylor et al., 2021). By avoiding others, the effects of loneliness can be even more profound (Taylor et al., 2021). However, opportunities, like support groups, to share and connect with others experiencing similar challenges, can provide great comfort and meaning. When we learn we are not alone in how we feel, we can forge authentic, supportive relationships.
The Importance of the Village
The need to have a village to raise a child begins as soon as (or even before) a child enters the world. Changes to our relationships with our partners and wider family networks can be expected during the transition to becoming parents (Taylor et al., 2021). However, these connections are more important than ever as we navigate the many challenges of caring for an infant. We were never meant to raise children alone, and we can only care for infants while caring for ourselves with the support of those around us.
We encourage you to reach out to your support network and let them know what type of help they can provide to you and your family. This support can take the form of asking a friend to attend your next pediatrician appointment with you, sharing a meal sign-up to keep your family nourished, or asking your partner to take turns to rest during the day. Taking intentional steps to connect with others, and strengthen our social landscape, can be very protective for our mental and emotional wellbeing during this transition.
Postpartum Experiences and Benefits of Support Groups
This type of support group provides the opportunity to connect with others moms who are experiencing the same ups and downs – and everything in between – that you are. The chance to receive not only understanding but genuine validation from fellow moms can be profoundly impactful during this challenging stage of life (Hurst, 2025). In addition to the emotional support these groups offer, this is also a space to learn about resources, tips, and advice that might be exactly what you need to hear at this moment. Maybe another mom just bought that travel sound machine you have been eyeing online and can share how helpful it has been for trips out with the baby. Perhaps you are wondering if some of the distressing postpartum thoughts and emotions you are experiencing are within the range of manageable or may need additional therapeutic services. This type of topic is exactly what a facilitator and group participants can discuss with you and offer support on.
At Wildflower, we believe deeply in this important support for new moms. Our new moms support groups meet weekly for six weeks. To learn about when the next group will be offered and hear more details about enrollment, reach out to us online or call 312.809.0298.
References
Hurst, Stephanie. (2025, January 10). The Importance of Mom Groups for New Moms. Motherhood Wellness Clinic. https://motherhoodwellnessclinic.com/the-importance-of-mom-groups-for-new-moms
Sebastian, L. (2016). Overcoming postpartum depression and anxiety (3rd ed.). Addicus Books.
Taylor, B. L., Howard, L. M., Jackson, K., Johnson, S., Mantovani, N., Nath, S., Sokolova, A. Y., & Sweeney, A. (2021). Mums Alone: Exploring the Role of Isolation and Loneliness in the Narratives of Women Diagnosed with Perinatal Depression. Journal of clinical medicine, 10(11), 2271. https://doi.org/10.3390/jcm10112271
Wildflower Center for Emotional Health. (Fall 2022). Pregnancy and Postpartum Mental Health Guide.
